Emmetsburg or Bust on Saturday, March 28th!

Whoever said we weren't an adventuresome bunch of beerdrinkers didn't know their facts. On the heels of a very successful Christmas Party at the Kent & Gail Wolfe residence on January 3rd, we're now heading west to Emmetsburg. Although Ford Motor Company will have no connection with this get together, I'm sure it will be a blast. For those of you unfortunate enough to miss our January 'Bobs meeting....too bad. We had a great time at the Wolf'e's. I keep trying to remember to take my note pad and pencil to our meetings to record some of the profoundly important statements that are made, but I always end up with a six-pak and a bottle opener instead. I am happy to report, though, that the following topics dominated our conversation,( not necessarily in their order of importance): Gateway 2000 sucks; the best damn red ale I ever tasted; Gateway 2000 sucks; did you know Ford pioneered beverage holders; Gateway 2000 can go to hell; I hope we can make it home through this ice storm. Rumor has it that the Emmetsburg crew took 3 hours to get home in the nasty weather that hit our area. Although I wasn't comprehending very well by midnight, I thought I heard Rich Kelly tell Jeff Twait that he was, perhaps, the best qualified to drive the van back, all things considered.

We did have a nice crowd in the Wolfe's basement, and as usual, we had plenty of homebrew to drink. Thanks for hosting this raucous group, Kent & Gail! Good thing you lowered your homeowners deductible to $50!

Emmetsburg?

What, me worry? I think it's high time we visit the community that's responsible for supplying us with 4 members. Rich Kelly, Jeff Twait, Steve Pelzer and Mike Scott all live in E'burg. Rich is personally responsible for getting me into CO2 and kegging. He also makes the best damn brisket this side of Texas. Rich holds the record for simultaneous batches of wort boiled (2) and most gallons of beer brewed in a 24-hour period (20). Jeff Twait holds the record for the most human beings transported to Denver, CO in a mini-van. Mike Scott, not to be outdone, brews more beer than any other independent business owner in E'burg with a last name starting with "S". Steve Pelzer, one of our newest members, is hosting our upcoming meeting, and I'm sure will hold some kind of record before the night is through.

Is Your Passport Current?

For those of you native to English speaking areas surrounding Palo Alto county: better start planning for this Brew Bob meeting yesterday. There are a number of adjustments you'll need to make:

1) Learn to speak their language. Sounds a little foolish, but if you don't, you'll be branded an "outsider." A little bit of a brogue will go a long way in E'burg. Jay Geving has found that freezing your tongue for several hours works about as well as anything.

2) Passport and one other form of picture I.D. will be necessary at the county line. If you have neither, take a black magic marker and write "County Cork" over the "Kossuth" on your license plate.

3) The sun goes down later in Palo Alto county, so you might want to alter your sleep habits a few days in advance to avoid jet-lag problems.

4) Take your international voltage converter if you plan on shaving or drying your hair. This warning came from Nick Scholer. Trust me, he knows his shit when it comes to electricity.

5) Contrary to rumor, anti-malarials are not necessary.

A little advance planning will help ensure that this Brew Bob meeting will be a memorable one for you!

So who the heck are Steve & Sandy Pelzer?

Steve and Sandy moved to Emmetsburg last summer from Muscatine, IA. Sandy works for AEA in Cylinder and Steve works for Murphy Family Farms in Algona. Sandy is the sister of Sue Bangert, who is the wife of Algona Police Chief Kevin Bangert. Steve has been brewing for a number of years, and makes the best damn red ale you've ever tasted. The Pelzers have met most of our crew....and haven't been frightened away. When yours truly and Randy Pierson ventured to their home recently to do some custom plumbing work, one of the Pelzers muttered (almost silently under their breath) that they'd like to host a 'Bob event. Not knowing that Randy has super-sensitive hearing, they were surprised when we told them it sounded like a great idea. It started out as a St. Patrick's Day event, but got pushed back a couple of weeks in hopes of catching nicer weather. If you've never met the Pelzers, this is your big chance!

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WARNING! READ CAREFULLY

"100 Years Ago"

From the files of the Algona Upper Des Moines, March 16, 1898.

"Whittemore Handles Toughs"

A lot of Emmetsburg toughs came to Whittemore Saturday to have a big time at the fire. Word was sent ahead of them and they were arrested before they had gotten very drunk or had stolen much. One young boy, said to belong to a respectable family, was carrying a pair of brass knuckles, a revolver and a razor as part of his regular equipment. The lot was reportedly kept in jail overnight and sent home. Some stealing was reported, however.

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I don't know what this may mean, but I'm sure I recently heard Don Kingfield say "Remember the Alamo."

And I don't know if this fact should worry our Emmetsburg friends, but Don's been known to skin people alive in foreign lands if they wouldn't accept a pair of VOSH's free spectacles. Oh well.....I wouldn't worry if I were Rich..or Mike..or Jeff..or Steve. Has Don ever showed you the Chinese stranglehold he learned in Khatmandu?

Rich promises to do some research to find out if any descendants of the Emmetsburg Toughs still live in the community. Maybe we could egg their houses or kick their dogs???? Worse yet, we could force them to take the last six-pak of Jay's Pumpkin Ale!

Directions, etc.

When approaching Emmetsburg on Highway 18 from the east, turn right (north) on Huron Street. It's pretty close to the east edge of town, and it's the corner where Wehrspan's Lumber is located. Proceed north until you come to 5th Street. Turn left (west) and continue until you come to Des Moines Avenue. The Pelzer home is a brown brick structure on the south-west corner of the intersection.

If you're approaching Emmetsburg from the south: get your silly ass rearranged so that you can follow the directions above.

Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is the same as always: bring beer and foode. As you know, we all love homebrew, so bring some if you've got some. If you're out, Emmetsburg has a wonderful liquor store just south of downtown on Highway 4 called Celtics. Mention you're a Brew Bob if you stop there. You can show up at the Pelzer's any time after 4:00 pm. on Saturday March 28th. We'll plan on calling it an evening whenever we're asked to leave.

Brew Bob Designer Clothing?

Darn tootin'! Rich Kelly will have a sample of a custom-embroidered "Brew Bob" baseball cap for your inspection. That's right - embroidered, not silk-screened! They'll run about $12. Bring cash or a check if you want to place an order.

Homebrew Store For NW Iowa?

I received a phone call last week from a gentleman by the name of Steve Beckett. Steve lives in Clarion and works in Clear Lake. He's an avid homebrewer and is kind of fed up with the unreliability and time-delays associated with mail order supplies. He's toying with the idea of opening a home-brew supply store somewhere between Clear Lake, Algona and Clarion. He asked me what sort of supplies we all used and where we bought them. I told him we all usually use mail-order.

Steve is curious what kind of support our members might give a "local" supply store. My response: I'm not sure but I can find out.

If you'd like to talk to Steve, he can be reached at 409 5th Avenue NE, Clarion, IA 50525.

I'm going to send him a copy of our membership list just in case he wants to contact anyone. Let me know your thoughts at our next meeting.

NOTE:

This space can be used to doodle on. Guys over 50.....this isn't what you think.

NOTE:

This space can be used for taking notes and collecting autographs at the next Brew Bobs meeting.

NOTE:

This space reserved for important telephone numbers, i.e. liquor store, bail-bondsman, etc.